YETI NOT SETI INSTITUTE ATTEMPTS RESCUE OF SASQUATCH MUSEUM ARTIFACTS! POLICE INTERVENE!

Heroic President-for-Life of the YETI-not-SETI Institute thwarted in attempt to rescue priceless Bigfoot artifacts! Released on Bail.

Dr. Karl Blinng, our brave and intrepid President-for-Life at the prestigious YETI-not-SETI Institute located in the wilderness of Yuba City, California, was briefly detained by Santa Cruz County police on suspicion of attempting to enter without permission the now sadly closed Bigfoot Discovery Museum located in frenzied Felton California. 

"I was framed! Or rather, the window frame wouldn't open.", exclaimed our Fearless Leader upon release from the local jail. "It's all a terrible misunderstanding! I wasn't engaged in robbery so much as saving priceless Sasquatch artifacts collected over decades from being lost to pseudo-science forever! I'm innocent, I tell youse, innocent! Now where is my damn lawyer?!"

Have you seen this man? If so, don't call us!

Ricard Scheister, a member of the Bored of Directors for the YETI-not-SETI Institute and legal counsel and bail bondsman for the organization, was surprised. "I'm surprised! I'm surprised Blinng didn't take any well-known professional tools used by burglars the world over. What a schmutz. Regrettably I'm on retainer, a bad decision made years ago... so I'm forced to defend this crypto-zoological-nut-case in court. It'd be nice if he paid my legal fees for once."

Dr. Blinng casing the joint... ah, reconnoitering the... sneaking around the... oh forget it! 

Dr. Blinng released an Institute press release later in the week: "Hey, it was all a joke, heh heh. Yeah, that's it, a joke! Yeah. While I thought I could 'borrow' a life-size statue of Sasquatch and put it in my living room, I soon understood that if I did my wife would poison my chicken soup. I was just trying to look over the priceless artifacts in the Bigfoot Discovery Museum, and then bid on them when they come up for auction at Billy Bob's auction warehouse, or on A-bay, whatever that is? I have a few credit cards which can score me an ancient Sasquatch coprolite or two!"

A Sasquatch was spotted at the Bigfoot Discovery Museum! Authorities are quiet on the matter. 

Erk Holohead, a member of the Bored of Directors and Spin & Propaganda Minister, was amazed. "I'm amazed! Firstly, I'm amazed Blinng didn't pull off the heist, er 'visit'. He was obsessed with acquiring those precious artifacts without paying for them? Secondly, an authentic Sasquatch was photographed crossing the Museum grounds soon after Blinng's arrest, ahhh, misunderstanding by local brave-officers-of-the-law... now can we our director's bail bond reduced, pretty please? Blinng may be eccentric but he poses no harm to anyone - - except for irritating small yappy dogs which invariably lunge for the ankles... with those nasty beasts he is ferocious."