Dr. Lulu Lomax, Crypto-Zoological Bone Doc and Bigfoot Huntress, joins the Institute's Bored of Directors! Female Representation Doubles!
Dr. Lulu Lomax had two major goals in her youth. One: To become an MD bone-surgeon with a side specialty in crypto-creature ortho-surgeries, de-licing treatments, and alien autopsies. Two: Discover a real Bigfoot in the wild. "The sight of blood never bothered me; red, green, whatever. The sight of Bigfoot blood is something I want to see! And Bigfoot bones, yes... Bigfoot bones!" She first encountered a feral bigfoot near the Brazos River in Texas in 2007. Along with Kelvin Kmess, Lulu ran into another Sasquatch beast in Panama in 2018. She also encountered a Bigfoot at a Florida Beach Resort in 2009. "The beasts looked disgusting and reminded me of a few of my teachers.", exclaimed Lomax. Her recent Sasquatch exploration in Montana, along with a healthy initiation fee in small unmarked bills, prompted her nomination to the bored of directors. The final vote for approval was 132-14, as one of the more elderly bored members objected to doubling the number of females on the board to two, and simultaneously allowing a Texas Aggie a seat on the bored. But when the objecting director nodded off and took a nap at the table, enthusiastic ballot stuffing and underhanded bribes commenced. In the end, the glittering allure of strengthened nepotism control overcame all objections.
To see the entire updated rogue's gallery of Bored Directors, please visit: YETI Not SETI Institute releases doctored photographs of key Bored Board of Director Members.
