YETI NOT SETI INSTITUTE Announces new TOP SECRET Corporate Anthem!

New Patriotic Anthem Institutionalized for the YETI NOT SETI Institute! Comrades Rejoice!

In an extremely rare spark of musical inspiration and genius, one of our Bored of Directors has decided that what a great Institute of serious scientific studies requires is a great patriotic anthem to inspire the poorly paid interns and temporary help the Institute hires when needed, mostly to clean up various physical and legal messes. 

Ricard Scheister, Esq, one of the founding members of the prestigious Institute, came up with the novel idea when voices started talking to him, ordering him to write the remarkable anthem. "It's not so much the amount of time I have or don't have on my idle hands, it's about the voices in my head. Those voices. Those incessant, horrible voices . . . .  must . . . resist . . . .". After a brief struggle the voices took over his brain, and his cerebral cortex duly spit out the official anthem. This work of musical art is an amazing example of perspiration inspiration (?).

Dr. Karl Blinng, President-for-Life of the YETI NOT SETI Institute, was thrilled. "I wish I'd thought of it first, darn it! That's OK, I'll get that Scheister later for this, somehow, somewhere. Just you wait!"

Erk Holohead, another founding member of the Institute, commented "Frankly this anthem is a stroke... of genius, I mean. It must be Institutionalized, along with its composer."

The Anthem is Top Secret, and only to be used by the Bored of Directors during secret meetings involving beer, pizza, and unspeakably secret cult rituals. 

Yeti Not Seti Institute

Official Document: Institutionalized Corporate Anthem

October 3, 2023

 DEEP IN THE HEART OF BIGFOOT

By Ricard Scheister, Esq.

 (New and improved)

(Sung to the tune of “Deep in the Heart of Texas”)

(Musical accompaniment by orchestral Kazoos and Harmonicas.)

  

The stars at night

Can cause a fright (clap clap clap clap)

When they shine down on Bigfoot.

That nasty brute

Is so hirsute. (clap clap clap clap)

Please stay upwind from Bigfoot

 

He’s big and hairy

And kind of scary. (clap clap clap)

But what is worst ‘bout Bigfoot

Is that awful smell

That stinks like hell (clap clap clap clap)

That emanates from Bigfoot.

 

Some call him Yeti,

Don’t call him SETI. (clap clap clap)

That is no name for Bigfoot.

Sasquatch will do,

And Crypto, too. (clap clap clap clap)

Those names are fine with Bigfoot.

 

Bliing, Holohead

and Scheisster said (clap clap clap clap)

That they’re researching Bigfoot.

But here’s a flash

It’s really cash (clap clap clap clap)

They’re trying to scam through Bigfoot.

 

Search far and near,

Search there and here (clap clap clap clap)

Search ev’ry ‘burb and boonie.

But his behind

No one can find (clap clap clap clap),

Not even Divot Looney.

 

We’ve searched all ‘round,

He can’t be found. (clap clap clap clap)

His hiding talent’s super.

But we’ve found out

The secret’s out (clap clap clap clap)

Bigfoot is D.B. Cooper!

 

We’ve never heard

a single word (clap clap clap clap)

that has been said by Bigfoot.

We know it blows, That’s how it goes

But ‘Cause noone knows (clap clap clap clap)

What’s in the heart of Bigfoot!

 

Institution Official Guidance:

The Institution’s Anthem is to be sung at the opening and closing of every official bored of directors meeting. Cheap pizza and beer are required during the ceremonies. The Anthem can be sung in languages other than English, accept under no circumstances in Esperanto.