Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Bored of Director Shake-up for the YETI NOT SETI Institute

Bored of Director Shake-up! Activist Investors Booted! Calm and Boringness Restored!


The YETI NOT SETI Institute announces an untimely expansion of the Institute's Bored of Directors, driven by very timely cash only contributions which finally cleared the bank:

Karl Blinng:
Ph.D., Chairman, Director, Champion, Fearless Leader. Genius. Certifiably Insane. Searching for precious Sasquatch vital bodily fluids or other sources of Bigfoot DNA.

Erk Holohead: 
Specialist in producing Institutional Self-Promoting Propaganda. Key goals are Fund Raising from bigfoot suckers, ah, sasquatch true believers (cash only please), Creative Financial Engineering to fool naive stockholders, and utilizing Essential Tax Evasion Expertise.

Ricard Schiester:
Ivy League Level Legal mis-representation, Quasi-Legal Consulting, Keeping the SEC, IRS, and DOJ off the scent, er, 'helping keep the Institute in compliance and respect recent court orders'....yeah, that's the ticket! On retainer. Charges by the micro-second. Demands payment upfront.

Brucillus Hail:
Newest member of the Bored of Directors. Invested in the Institute because he was promised a non-existent time-share condo in Key West. Fool! He has no idea what he is gotten himself into. He has witnessed Sasquatch cat carnage.

Krass FFFFleps:
Missing for years and doesn't pay his dues. Rumored to be running a jug wine vineyard for a Russian Oligarch in Siberia. In revenge, the Institute puts his name on any sensitive legal or financial documents which might catch the attention of Interpol or other pesky law enforcement agencies.

It has been suggested that the Bored of Directors consists of a bunch of Morons. Not at all! The Bored of Directors consists of a secret cabal of Livermorons!

About The YETI not SETI Institute.

Sunday, July 24, 2016

Pokémon Go Players Warned about Bigfoot Danger!

Is that a Bigfoot on your smartphone camera? It's not a Pokémon Go creature! It's Real..... RUN AWAY!


The YETI not SETI Institute, as a public service and a blatant attempt to gain financial contributors among Millenial Mobs playing this idiotic, er inspiring real virtual reality game, wants to warn Pokémon Go players about the risk of Bigfoot sightings.

"When you see a Bigfoot on your Pokémon Go screen, don't try to capture it. These beasts will not take kindly to your attempts to grab them. Instead, these mangy Sasquatches might just decide to grab you!", said Erk Holohed, a dodgy member of the YETI not SETI bored of directors. "If you spot a Sasquatch on your smartphone, stop, drop, roll, turn, get up, and run for it! You get zero points for a Bigfoot."
This foul creature won't be found in Pokémon Go!
Ricard Schiester esq., shady lawyer by trade and yet another unpaid member of the bored of directors, had this warning; "Read the fine print on your user agreement with Pokémon Go. At no point are you protected against injuries suffered due to attempts to capture Sasquatches, Loch Ness Monsters, Evil Masterminds, Invading Space Aliens, and Fuller Brush Salesmen. You're on your own!"

Karl Blinng, Director of the Institute and on parole, was unavailable for comment. "He's out of the crypto-zoololgy lab today, playing Pokémon Go", said his underpaid PR agent. "He gets really excited when he spots a Sleeping Bulbasaur."

Video: The dangers of Bigfoot and Pokémon Go:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tACnkp4oViY

Sunday, July 17, 2016

International Bigfoot Conference 2016

International Bigfoot Conference 2016

When: September 2,3,4 2016 in Kennewick, Washington

Learn More: http://www.internationalbigfootconference.com/

Register: http://www.internationalbigfootconference.com/#!get-tickets/s4h8e

Why is the prestigious YETI NOT SETI Institute promoting this Sasquatch conference? The conference is just like the other ones we've not been invited to attend or present. Our many Institute proposals to present really important gigantopithecus revoltus research papers at such events have been repeatedly rejected for dumb reasons like 'having no scientific merit', 'dubious research' and other ridiculous excuses. The fools!

OK, we're jealous! We tried a Bigfoot conference once in fabulous Yuba City, but only our board of directors showed up, and that was because free beer & pizza were served. We're desperate to attend any Sasquatch conference where there is free food. Perhaps this attempt to curry favor by promoting their conference will finally work. We heard someone may buy free drinks there, so we're really interested in attending.